Why do people travel far and wide? Leave away their homes, acqaintances, familiarity that has bred from childhood? I guess as Pi Patel said..in search of better life. Better life? What does better life account for? Money, facilities, glitzy surroundings? I guess this pretty much accounts for it. But these are things which are importnat to anybody's life, me being no exception. But as is the rule of this universe, you gain some and you lose some. These things come at a price and that price is the far distance that one must travel from his home.
Hefty price some might think, for some may be not.There are people, however who would travel far away in search of that peace in one's life, that he so desperately seeks.
We have eaten what we love to eat, we have seen what we love to see, we have met who we love to meet. Hopefully all of this amounts to a holiday spent well, time well utilised. This vacuum however, I guess is meant to stay and it seems rather difficult for it to be fulfilled with any of these things. In fact another vacuum which always come into force, whenever I am leaving my home is very difficult to cope with. The effect stays for quite some time in a dominant fashion, then in a subdued manner..but it stays..always does.
The urge to remain with home for as long as possible, as delayed as possible is I believe not very uncommon. Most people with an extra dose of emotional juices would know of this feeling. It is so strange..the attachment with the land of one's origin, with place alone, completely non living things is almost as strange as the one that you feel with your loved ones. Does this atachment have to do with a particular bond with the place or a familiarity that breeds into an individual due to his association that started from his birth.
May be it is the change in these familiar surroundings that upsets the human being once he travels far and wide. Man is a social animal and it is typical of animals to feel upset and disturbed once their surroundings are tampered with. As Pi Patel educates us..an animal will do anything to defend its territory. What about us though? We will do anything to leave our territory. And for what? For a better life.
For people whose very existence is challenged and resources mandatory for survival are hard to come by, it probably makes sense to leave one's territory. Just like migratory birds..hopping from one comfort zone to another. But there is a stark dissimilarity here. Birds migrate with their entire flock to all the places..that is their strength. We humans, leave our flock far behind and keep migrating in search of what? A better life.
Sunday, July 26, 2009
Thursday, July 23, 2009
Mind is restless
Concentration or focus is probably one of the most fragile intangible things that will ever be known to mankind. Sustaining a thought for a very long time, I guess demands an extra psychological strength than ordinary human beings possess. Building upon that thought I guess holds the key to a lot of greater stuff that we can achieve on a more regular basis. May be not questioning the initial spark as it occurs or not pursuing it due to some or the other reason has become more of a norm.
But who is seeking greatness here. This is an answer to the horde of thoughts that just keeps flooding the head..clearly a reflection of an untamed, undisciplined mind, that either does not know how to stay fixed on a particular thought or more importantly is not sure of what that thought is? May be this is the case with most of us. This uncertaininty..not being sure of what is needed is linked to the restlesness factor.
People who are committed to certain tasks in their lives, beyond work..do they ever feel the vacuum which has been bothering me? Could it just be the perusal of a particular task in a disciplined manner that could fill this vacuum? May be it could or may be it again is just a frivuolous question, which is a resultant of the restlessness or the uncertainity.
I am being cautious of the fact that I question each and every notion that is striking me, to ensure that may be it could be true that all of this is just crap and an outcome of....yes, not being sure, or simply put restless. 'All I want is to be happy' said Agastya Sen. A statement which will strike a chord with may be the entire human race, has remained with me for so many years now, but like all of us I do not know if I will ever be able to figure out, that what exactly is going to make me truly and eternally happy.
How can happiness be a permanent state of mind? Calmness of mind seems to be directly linked to the state of hapiness. The word calm sounds so peaceful in its pronunciation. I can only imagine , what it will be like in real.
But who is seeking greatness here. This is an answer to the horde of thoughts that just keeps flooding the head..clearly a reflection of an untamed, undisciplined mind, that either does not know how to stay fixed on a particular thought or more importantly is not sure of what that thought is? May be this is the case with most of us. This uncertaininty..not being sure of what is needed is linked to the restlesness factor.
People who are committed to certain tasks in their lives, beyond work..do they ever feel the vacuum which has been bothering me? Could it just be the perusal of a particular task in a disciplined manner that could fill this vacuum? May be it could or may be it again is just a frivuolous question, which is a resultant of the restlessness or the uncertainity.
I am being cautious of the fact that I question each and every notion that is striking me, to ensure that may be it could be true that all of this is just crap and an outcome of....yes, not being sure, or simply put restless. 'All I want is to be happy' said Agastya Sen. A statement which will strike a chord with may be the entire human race, has remained with me for so many years now, but like all of us I do not know if I will ever be able to figure out, that what exactly is going to make me truly and eternally happy.
How can happiness be a permanent state of mind? Calmness of mind seems to be directly linked to the state of hapiness. The word calm sounds so peaceful in its pronunciation. I can only imagine , what it will be like in real.
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Holidays
And finally holidays begin. Holidays, always long awaited and looked forward to. Not many of my vacations have been with a very well thought out agenda. Visiting places, meeting people, eating out, visiting familiar places of interest and joy is pretty much that I will ideally want to do during my time off. But its been different from some time now. While I still have been doing pretty much the same things in my recent holidays, there has been this evergrowing thought of doing things to may be address something remotely different. There are a whole bunch of thoughts that keep swarming the mind whenever I think about it. Educational pursuits, inner relaxation, which I dont know if anyone ever achieves, especially when I do not even know what that exactly means. Relaxation for the body is something that I understand and always hope that I can achieve. But these rush of thoughts about some impending task or emotion has not always allowed that to be.
I have been really looking forward to this time off as exhaustion has currently crossed all limits. As my dear friend from English August says, 'Mind is restless...O Krishna'. These words have become a permanent state of mind, and mind is a wild animal racing in directions and ways that I would not want it to go. Its not as if people around the world do not work or I am experiencing a unique situation, its just that now the situation has taken over my being in a very prominent manner. The mind is restless..O Krishna. I do not want to be restless. i guess that is what I seek to do in this time off. I guess this is why the anxiety exists as I do not know how to be in a state which is not restless. I know the reasons behind the physical sufferings of my body now and may be to a certain extent I also know the reasons behind the mental turbulence. What I do not know for sure is how do I make myself prepared and disciplined to face these issues.
I guess the basic character of a person has a great role to play in handling such issues. May be my hyperactive, somewhat eccentric nature is the biggest hurdle in addressing this state of restleness. And why am I writing today? Its because the rush of thoughts crossed a threshhold limit today and I believe this rush forced the idea of starting to write or otherwise these random obscure thoughts would have no outlet..no vent. This is not for any other purpose but only for the fact that I want my mind to feel a bit relaxed and I think that after a little over a page, this is not a bad idea. I anyways have, as far as I can remember had an observation, random thought or view on anything and everything. In other words..a restless mind.
As the rush of blood to the head probably slows a bit now and this music starts doing its trick, my physical restlessness eases up a bit momentarily. For no particular reason, I am reminded that water has always acted as a great healer for me. Let there be one thing clear about this writing. This is not for any other purpose, but only for it to act as a gateway for my randomness. Its so weird that a normal looking exterior can within itself brew such a bizzare streak of thoughts and emotions. Does the mind actually have the capacity to send signal of solutions to address a randomness that prevails the mind. I for one did not consciously think of straing to write today, no planning was done, but a sudden thought in the shower results into this, for which I am already thankful to almighty grey matter.
Water, for another example did not enter my mind in a planned or conscious way. I am starting to believe that similar to a defence mechanism for bodily ailments, the mind also senses the mental restlessness and hence signals automatic blurbs of possible solutions. May be this has always been the case with everyone, including myself. Why this is sounding different now is may be because I have never given much attention to this restlessness or may be because it has slowly gained predominance as a result of being ignored.
Relaxed..that is what all of us want to be, me being no exception. While nature, excursions and activities are a great way to relaxe, what does one do for the mind? May be to some extent it does relaxe, but it does not take more than a word, a second, a thought or even a remote dream to disturb the relaxed state. Not that I am a pessimist or that I am suffering seriously, its just that off late there has been a vacuum, that probably has been expanding constantly. May be the fulfillment of this vacuum holds the key to this restlesness. But may be not. This materialistic never ending pursuit will never let the restlesness settle. One thing is leading to another and I see no end to this chase till the end of my life. My life is no different to anyone else. I am not doing something that others have not already done or are not doing, but off late the thought of what exactly am I looking for or what is that I want badly has been criss crossing the mind.
I know that a lot of restless has to do with my inability to find an answer to this question. Random answers have been floating, which definitely seem to be aiming to fill this vacuum, this uncertainity. Educational pursuit, not for any career ambition, but for enrichment has been high on the mind and a few steps have been taken by me in that direction. But I feel so sorry that full justice has not been done to that step yet. I guess the job of the mind is to only show you that possible blurb of thought. At the end of the day, it takes great character, resilience and a lot of self discipline with commitment to realise that blurb of thought. That I believe is the marked difference between people and extra ordinary people. However just as a self boost, thats not been the case always. Certain blurbs have been achieved and thats what I aim to do in these holidays. Realise the blurbs. Do not ignore them.
Can blurbs be also called impulsive decisions. If time of decision is the criteria then may be yes. But actually what has forced these blurbs to surface is the turbulence in the mind. Mind's defence mechanism ensures that it is relaxed. That is what I would like to believe. May be once the blurb is offered, then you can put on your practical hat to decide whether you would want to do it? What needs to be seen is how effective these thoughts prove to be. Hope to find the answer for this by the time I go back.
I have been really looking forward to this time off as exhaustion has currently crossed all limits. As my dear friend from English August says, 'Mind is restless...O Krishna'. These words have become a permanent state of mind, and mind is a wild animal racing in directions and ways that I would not want it to go. Its not as if people around the world do not work or I am experiencing a unique situation, its just that now the situation has taken over my being in a very prominent manner. The mind is restless..O Krishna. I do not want to be restless. i guess that is what I seek to do in this time off. I guess this is why the anxiety exists as I do not know how to be in a state which is not restless. I know the reasons behind the physical sufferings of my body now and may be to a certain extent I also know the reasons behind the mental turbulence. What I do not know for sure is how do I make myself prepared and disciplined to face these issues.
I guess the basic character of a person has a great role to play in handling such issues. May be my hyperactive, somewhat eccentric nature is the biggest hurdle in addressing this state of restleness. And why am I writing today? Its because the rush of thoughts crossed a threshhold limit today and I believe this rush forced the idea of starting to write or otherwise these random obscure thoughts would have no outlet..no vent. This is not for any other purpose but only for the fact that I want my mind to feel a bit relaxed and I think that after a little over a page, this is not a bad idea. I anyways have, as far as I can remember had an observation, random thought or view on anything and everything. In other words..a restless mind.
As the rush of blood to the head probably slows a bit now and this music starts doing its trick, my physical restlessness eases up a bit momentarily. For no particular reason, I am reminded that water has always acted as a great healer for me. Let there be one thing clear about this writing. This is not for any other purpose, but only for it to act as a gateway for my randomness. Its so weird that a normal looking exterior can within itself brew such a bizzare streak of thoughts and emotions. Does the mind actually have the capacity to send signal of solutions to address a randomness that prevails the mind. I for one did not consciously think of straing to write today, no planning was done, but a sudden thought in the shower results into this, for which I am already thankful to almighty grey matter.
Water, for another example did not enter my mind in a planned or conscious way. I am starting to believe that similar to a defence mechanism for bodily ailments, the mind also senses the mental restlessness and hence signals automatic blurbs of possible solutions. May be this has always been the case with everyone, including myself. Why this is sounding different now is may be because I have never given much attention to this restlessness or may be because it has slowly gained predominance as a result of being ignored.
Relaxed..that is what all of us want to be, me being no exception. While nature, excursions and activities are a great way to relaxe, what does one do for the mind? May be to some extent it does relaxe, but it does not take more than a word, a second, a thought or even a remote dream to disturb the relaxed state. Not that I am a pessimist or that I am suffering seriously, its just that off late there has been a vacuum, that probably has been expanding constantly. May be the fulfillment of this vacuum holds the key to this restlesness. But may be not. This materialistic never ending pursuit will never let the restlesness settle. One thing is leading to another and I see no end to this chase till the end of my life. My life is no different to anyone else. I am not doing something that others have not already done or are not doing, but off late the thought of what exactly am I looking for or what is that I want badly has been criss crossing the mind.
I know that a lot of restless has to do with my inability to find an answer to this question. Random answers have been floating, which definitely seem to be aiming to fill this vacuum, this uncertainity. Educational pursuit, not for any career ambition, but for enrichment has been high on the mind and a few steps have been taken by me in that direction. But I feel so sorry that full justice has not been done to that step yet. I guess the job of the mind is to only show you that possible blurb of thought. At the end of the day, it takes great character, resilience and a lot of self discipline with commitment to realise that blurb of thought. That I believe is the marked difference between people and extra ordinary people. However just as a self boost, thats not been the case always. Certain blurbs have been achieved and thats what I aim to do in these holidays. Realise the blurbs. Do not ignore them.
Can blurbs be also called impulsive decisions. If time of decision is the criteria then may be yes. But actually what has forced these blurbs to surface is the turbulence in the mind. Mind's defence mechanism ensures that it is relaxed. That is what I would like to believe. May be once the blurb is offered, then you can put on your practical hat to decide whether you would want to do it? What needs to be seen is how effective these thoughts prove to be. Hope to find the answer for this by the time I go back.
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